Friday, April 08, 2011

Hockey colour, but ...

End of the Lent Term. Son was happy.

Husband and I attended the end-of-term concert and final assembly.

It was a very pleasant surprise to us when son's name was included in the list for Hockey colours.

"He'd be so happy," I said, while waiting for him to emerge from his locker room.

But no, son was not looking happy.

"Why are you looking so sad?"

Answer: Someone said he heard other boys saying I don't really deserve the colour.

I was most annoyed.

On the first Headmaster's assembly after his ski trip, when he was presented the "skier of the week" award, he was confronted in public by a classmate for being selfish, in a manner that left him with no chance of defending himself.

The boys managed to settle the matter amongst themselves later on, which was good, but it totally ruined what would have been a very happy start to a weekend.

Today, after winning an award for the first time, ever, in a school sport, his achievement was being belittled by classmates (allegedly) because he "did not deserve it". Once again it ruined the start of our term break.

Why are these boys so wicked? Why are they so unkind to my son?

My son went up immediately to his teacher to ask, "Was that a typo?" He thought perhaps he was given the colour by mistake. It was not a mistake.

We phoned Nanny to give her the news. Her first response was, "O! Just like grandad."

Grandad was an ace hockey player.

Son is not a natural at sport, but is good in academic work and music. He tries very hard at games. Just two weeks ago he was chuffed that he came in 10th in his cross-country in his age group, eighth in his class, in a very good time.

Some weeks before that he told me, with pride in his voice, "Mum, I can kick a rugby ball now."

Great, I said, well done.

"Yeah, but the other boys in class could do that three years ago."

Only in recent months have they been playing more hockey and I was surprised the first time I was told by a staff member that he played really well. But he was sad that he was not in the A team. Instead, because his rugby had really come on, according to the Games Master, he was made to play rugby.

Eventually he was back on the hockey team, and seemed happier.

Any way we are happy that he finally has been recognized for his effort in a sport. To the boy/s who say he does not deserve the award, my response to them would be, "The correct response to that should be 'Congratulations!'"

If my son has said to a classmate that he did not deserve an award (in school work, say), I would be very cross with my son. In my opinion it is bad form, poor upbringing, appalling manners to say to someone, "You don't deserve an award."

Last week he had a homework assignment which required to consider which of the Ten Commandments he thought was the most significant. His answer was, "do not envy" (covet), because it leads to the other sins (theft, murder, adultery, etc).

We concluded that these other boys are just envious of him.

He was given his effort and attainment grades. He was not impressed by the list of A grades (English, Maths, Science, Latin, French, Music, etc) , "I've got an 'A' in Games," was his delighted response.